Please, Mr.Sandman

I don't sleep at night because I'm a dreamer. A dreamer in the sense that while I lay in bed trying to sleep, my mind uncontrollably imagines and creates elaborate scenes in my head. How could the events of my day have been changed, what would I do differently, who do I wish I had run into and what would I have said. I review, revise and rewrite my day in the way I wish it had gone. It's amazing what runs through my head between the time I lay down and the time I manage to fall asleep. I choreograph full ballets, I run into my ex who begs me to get back with him, I make phone calls, pay bills and at the end of the day my crush always falls madly in love with me. It's annoying really. My mind never stops running even for a second and I spend hours and hours just staring up at the ceiling waiting for a moment of peace. Just a moment to relax so I can finally fall asleep. But no matter how tired my body feels, my mind is always awake and active, thinking, planning, reeling. My thoughts are a tapestry of real people, places, events and those that I've dreamed up. Every scene has a soundtrack and a happy ending. Everything goes my way and the impossible is always in my reach.

I've tried everything to quiet my mind just long enough for me to fall asleep, but nothing works. I try not to think, I count sheep, I read my textbook until I start to doze off. But one thought always leads to another and another and before I know it hours have passed and it's almost morning. Most days I don't manage to fall asleep until the sun comes up, and my alarm clock threatens me before I get even a minute of rest. The same thing every night. If you slept next to me you could almost hear the gears turning and cranking while I lay wide awake all night.

I guess I should be grateful for my active and creative mind, but when it means my days are spent in total mental and physical exhaustion it's hard to see the upside. What is it about my mind that wont shut off at night like it's supposed to?