The Subconscious vs. The Unconscious

I don't believe we have a subconscious, which may be strange as a Psychology major. I especially don't buy into Freud's definition in which every person is motivated by something unknown to themselves, and usually that something is the desire to sleep with his or her parents. Of course, Freud was a quack. A brilliant quack who had some serious issues himself, I can imagine. But regardless, I can't subscribe to the idea that we make most of our choices based on something we are not aware of. I mean, we are clearly not consciously aware of every process going on in our brains but humans are metacognitive beings. We are aware that we think, we think about our thoughts and we can change them as we see fit. That is what makes us unique from almost every other creature on this planet. So how is it that, being conscious of our own thoughts, we can still be motivated by unknown operations? Don't you think we would individually discover these processes if we thought hard enough about it? On a daily basis we delve pretty far into our own minds, I'm sure something like that would surface eventually. Most people know that they do not want to have sex with their parents, and maintain that through their respective lives despite what Freud says. So I can't believe that there is some kind of process going on beneath our conscious thought.

However, I do believe that there are some things that we may not consciously know about ourselves. Sometimes there are things in our unconscious (note: not the same as subconscious) that we don't want to face or can't admit about ourselves. After all, people are discovering and rediscovering themselves every day. They are learning new things, changing opinions, adopting new strategies and getting to know the world a little bit better.

Which brings me to my point. I read a theory somewhere that says people are in exactly the type of relationship that they need to be in at that time. This seems strange considering that almost everyone complains about their relationships. No one really seems to be completely happy at the time in whatever romantic situation they are (or are not) in, including myself. I'm perpetually single, and I hate it. But I started to think about it a little more deeply. I don't want to be single. But I also don't want to be in a relationship with just anyone. I want to be with someone who will appreciate that I'm an amazing girl. I want someone who is strong and independent and who knows what he wants. I want someone who can't take his hands off me, who wants all of me, all the time. That's a lot to ask of someone, and I wont settle for less. Thus, we come back to my perpetually single conundrum. If I know exactly what I want but haven't found it yet, it makes sense that I'm still sitting here alone. Loneliness is what I need until I find what I am ultimately looking for.

Think about it. Wherever you are in your relationship right now is exactly where you need to be, subconscious processes or none.