Absolument Rien

1) The rhinos were boning today, woo hoo! The safari has had them for eight years and no babies yet. Apparently it's hard to mate rhinos because the female has a weird reproductive cycle or something, but they were mounting today. Mack's boner is so huge, it looks like a fifth leg.

2) I've unconsciously conditioned myself to puke at just the smell of McDonalds, it disgusts me that much. I can't even go into a McD's anymore.

3) I've been walking a lot lately. Nothing can clear my head like a nice long walk through the park.

4) I had a date the other night, and I haven't had so much fun in a long time. We had dinner and didn't even realize the restaurant was closing around us as we were sitting there laughing and talking. Sometimes you just need to be reminded that there are still people out there you can connect with.

5) My favourite food changes every week. This week it's nectarines, mmmmm.

6) At a job where you're talking constantly and all day there are bound to be some verbal slip-ups. Today's top safari slip-up: Apparently giraffe are the fastest animals on earth and have a calf once every 25 years. Oops.

7) I want to write another Ode soon, and I can't choose who I wanna dedicate it to. Think you're good enough?? Send me a comment with an explanation as to why you deserve a post in your honour (and some ass kissing wouldn't hurt either.)