Yappity Yap

1) I need to start packing my room soon. Moving day is on Sunday and we're all anxious to finally get into our new place. Packing is one of those jobs that is so ominous and huge that you don't know where to start and end up putting it off until the very last minute. All are welcome to come help. Free beer! (And by "free" I mean "no.")

2) I had an interview to be a tour guide at the African Lion Safari yesterday. Don't you dare make fun of me, it's a summer job, ok? I need something for only two months because of my UK hiatus, and I'm sick of working with children. God knows I love 'em, but that's all I do. I need to meet people my own age for once, and you and I both know I'm too good for the food service industry. At the safari I get to work outside, learn to drive a boat/bus/train and watch monkeys hump each other all day.

3) I still officially have no plans for my trip. All I know is that I'm going and it's starting to freak me out. My lack of planning is starting to bother the obsessive-compulsive part of my personality. There's a little voice in my head that's saying "What the hell are you going to do when you get there?" I know it'll all work out and be an experience of some kind (positive or negative) but my anxiety is growing by the day.

4) I'm having toilet paper wars with myself because both of my roommates upstairs have moved out. Everyday I watch the roll dwindle and wonder what will happen once I'm down to the last square.

5) I'm an emotional wreck today. I drove past my high school and started to cry (note: I did not like high school, but I was overcome by the memories. Yes, I am a tool.) About a half hour later I started sobbing in my car again, this time for no apparent reason. I still don't know what set me off. Maybe I'm stressed because of my trip. I'm not good at guessing when or why I'm stressed. I usually just wait until people start telling me I'm being a bitch. When I get called a bitch, that means I'm stressed. Maybe crying all the time for no reason means I'm stressed too.

6) Some drunk girl at the bar stepped on my foot with her stiletto last night, and now I can't walk. I have a big purple welt of a heel mark on my foot. Stupid girls and their stupid shoes.

7) Speaking of shoes, I bought the cutest pair of metallic turquoise, strappy wedges a couple weeks ago by accident. They leapt into my hands and begged me to buy them.

8) Yesterday I went to see my girlfriend in London for her birthday, and never in my life have I felt so unattractive. Every girl in this place was blonde and had great legs, which made me feel like an ugly duckling surrounded by Gucci and Prada. But strangely, I was hit on more than I have ever been in my life. One guy followed me home despite me telling him right to his face I wouldn't sleep with him. Another stopped short to tell me how gorgeous I was and yet another got down on his knees in the middle of the bar to beg for my number. It was baffling! I swear everyone in that city is rich and beautiful and trendy. It's like the Los Angeles of Canada minus all the movie stars.